Selfishness can corrode a relationship.

I would like to share some priceless insight with all of you, my wonderful readers….. There are many different types of people in this world, there are those who give and those who take. In a perfect scenario, there is an equal amount of giving and taking and it is reciprocated. Imagine if you will, your heart – it pumps blood throughout your body, sending vital blood goodies to all of your organs so they stay functioning properly…and you stay alive. Now, suppose that your organs started to just keep that blood and not let it pass through back to your heart… or if your kidneys and liver no longer bothered to filter any toxins. This is how selfishness works.

As a human being, I would have to say that my greatest joys come from seeing others happy. I enjoy the laughter of children and adults alike and a smile is not only precious but contagious. Unfortunately, negativity can be just as contagious and most people who spread it, don’t even realize that they are being selfish. Here are a few tips for when you are feeling low, that will help you avoid hurting others:

1. Share How You Feel – Your friends and family may be pretty awesome but they are probably not mind readers. Approach them individually and ask for a moment of their time, you might be surprised how many people you have in your life who really truly care about your well-being.

2. If You Seek out Advice, Take it! – If you have sat down with friends or family members to seek advice on how to handle your current issues, at least try to do some of the things suggested. Many times your loved ones have been in a similar situation or know someone who has. They are only trying to give you options to help ease your troubles. Remember, they made time for you and it is only respectful to make an effort to help yourself.

3. Be the Change You Seek – If I really want to lose 20 lbs and fit into some of my smaller clothes, I would be on the treadmill instead of writing a blog and sipping coffee right now. The fact of the matter is this: If you want something…. I mean, you really want something, you WILL make it happen. Remember those killer boots that were kind of on sale last month or that HD 50″ flat screen TV?? Yeah, that is what I’m talking about…. these things did not take much effort up front so the choice seems simple. I have some news for you though, your boots will wear out and your TV will be obsolete in a few years. There are things in this life that are fulfilling that we desire, such as a better job or a different career. Whatever hole you are currently in, the only way out is to grab your bootstraps (they just might be the ones on sale) and hike your butt out of that hole!

4. A Little Advice About the Change – When we are feeling down and low, it is so easy to want to give up and we tend to get very overwhelmed when looking at the big picture. When you have a goal in mind, take some time to map out a few steps to get on your way to achieving it. For me to lose 20 lbs, my first step is to get moving… make the effort to get on the treadmill. In my professional life, I decided I wanted to help people full time and I applied to grad school. There are many steps for me to take before I become a licensed therapist but I have been diligent in this because it is what I truly want. I am making it happen.

5. You are Never Invisible – Don’t try to disappear or run away from your problems. This will only cause your loved ones to worry about you and it is probably one of the most selfish acts there is. You have a support group, a network of friends and family who have already made time for you and who are trying to understand how you are feeling. By running away and trying to disappear, you are only showing that you don’t care about them or their feelings as much as they have been caring for yours. There is always a better choice, there are always more options that you can see in front of you and there is never a reason to give up.

There are millions of people in this world today who are in financial trouble, suffering from addictions or depression and other mental and physical illness. There is not one person on this Earth more important or deserving than another, we all matter to someone….. please make sure they matter to us too!

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